Contract for Caregiving
We spend a lot of time on giving care, but the value of caregiving is under-recognized, in fact, it is not even part of the economy. For a long time, I thought the solution to recognizing the importance of caregiving is perfect empathy - if everyone weight their need and other people’s needs equally then we ought to have a more caring society. But simply demanding perfect empathy is unrealistic, at least for now. The idea of compromising on our own needs for another’s goes against our evolutionary instinct. In order for perfect empathy to exists, there has to be trust - I will look out for your needs if I trust that you are also looking out for mine. But if any one agent decides to break the rule, then the trust will be broken and we will all be incentivized to selfish again!
So how do we create a system of trust? Well, historically we have done so through contracts, in other words by signing a legally enforceable agreement! So why don’t we have contracts for caregiving too? The caregiving contract could clearly outlines the duty of the caregiver, their compensation (if any) and the duration etc. It would be sign by the person who needs care and their nominated caregiver (who doesn’t necessary has to be a family member). The government could provide subsidies or benefit payment to caregivers based on the nature of care they provide, akin to paid family leave.
At first, it didn’t sit well with me that we could mix caregiving, something that so rooted in love, with a legal contract, something so black and white. I worried that we would stop caring naturally for one another altogther. Then I realized that this is a tried and tested practise - marriage is after all a legal contract built upon love! We don’t stop loving our partner just because that love is legally recognized by the government. Similarly, a legal contract around caregiving shouldn’t diminish the love that makes caregiving possible. Instead, it legitimizes the relationship and recognizes the work involved and helps to sustain that love!
That’s not to say that caregiving contract is an replacement for perfect empathy! it’s extremely important that we work towards being a kinder and more empathetic society. But until we have a BCI that allows us to know exactly how one is feeling (It’s very debatable if that’s even a good thing, rabbit hole for another time🐰), a caregiving contract is a much more realisitc and attainable goal!
Crediting this thought to my PI, Alison Gopnik, who has been a proponent of legitimizing caregiving, for sparring with me when I questioned her about this concept!